Friday, August 25, 2006

Orkomeos

Orkomeo - (Orkut+ Romeo) A category of the male Homo sapien who dwells in a virtual world of social networking. Usually on the hunt for ever-lasting virtual love, but is willing to stop by every suitable candidate and try out his flirting skills(?) and collection of miserable pick up lines. Has also been described as creepy, desperate and disillusioned.

Can be categorized as:

Narcissism personified -

The kind who's orkut album always contains a pic that he clicked of himself in the mirror. Dreamy eyes. Pouty lips. Shirt buttons half undone. No wonder he couldn't get anyone else to click that picture!

Our John Abraham wannabe bravely performed the task on his own.. and in a momentary lapse of both sanity and modesty, put it up on the public album.

Then, goes on to describe himself in various degrees of cool and sexy and also posts a link to a Yahoo! album (orkut's 12 pic album would never suffice to capture him in all his good-looking glory).


Old-fashioned-lover-boy -

The kind that scraps an ode to your eyes (stolen right out of Shah Rukh's luscious lips). Their depth, their color and their innocence. Doesn't matter if the only pic you have on display has you wearing shades.

Proceeds to scrap you with images of a teddy bear and tweety bird... closely followed by a request to start a long lasting sincere relationship with you.

Already? you don't want to pen a poem about my pancreas first?


Mood Swinger -

This is the kind that hosts an album with close-up pics in every mood and the most unimaginative captions. And scraps you to say "album updated just for you".

Me smiling in happy manner.

Me stepping out of house after snow-storm.
Me 60% sad and a 40% angry.
Me thinking (sometimes hee hee).

The next one should really be:

Me- dying of sheer embarrassment!

Couldn't feast my eyes on the rest as the server misbehaved... no donut for you!


Dude in Distress -

hi cutie... i'm new to orkut.. could you please help me out.

Sure didn't need help finding me through sam > Satan > aishwarya rai > badal...why does it rain > ramprasad doesn't want to study!

Needless to mention it's the lamest pick-up like since apna 70's bollywood hero mouthed the words 'aap ko pehle kahin dekha hai'.

Unfortunately for him, I'm old to orkut and opt to ignore such requests.


Active Return-Visitor -

The kind that waits with bated breath for his daily visitor activity and sends every female on the list a friendship request. At times these are accompanied by scraps like...

hi baby... so u visited my profile. what u decided? my friend? or something more ;) ?

kya dekhna chahti hai? milna hai tho email kar...

One click!... thats all it took to invite this calamity upon myself.


Several other types (including the hopeful hunk and the message maniac) and sub-types of the species are swarming the virtual world and there are new ones mushrooming as you're reading these very words.

As orkut continues to be my primary source of entertainment... I haven't deleted my account as yet and have prepared myself to endure a few orkomeos [:)] !

.

11 comments:

pavan kumar said...

hehe, you really do have a damn good sense of classification..

[sarcasm]if you want to know more abt me, please visit my Orkut Profile [/sarcasm]

Swathi Sambhani aka Chimera said...

rofl...

nice categorization, i find orkut to be made of losers who can't for the life of them approach a woman in real life but find it easier on the virtual platform.

Prashanth said...

You mean like,

Hi my name is XYZ and I want to make friendship with you. I have read your profile and we have lots in common. Please be free in emailing me! I am very looking forward to it.

Anonymous said...

ah...chirkut

ok i agree that i haven't checked ur profile to see how much we have common b/w us as u were saying...but whats that!! u even started writing about me...well...
okie i add u..
hahaha..

Wriju said...

Then there are females who talk about all the orkoromeos that visit her orkut site and give her a hard time - wonder why she put all those sexy pics on her blog :-)

sunshine said...

@pavan : thanx man! i enjoyed that u enjoyed! and looved the sarcasm tag!

@swathi : how true... suddenly on orkut they turn superheroes

@prashanth and scarecrow : lol!!! plz don't make me endure these on my blog :)

@wriju : no insinuations here i hope :) ... i swear i only have an innocently smiling pic in my profile.

Anonymous said...

Getting married and having a baby makes a woman ancient, I suppose. Your blog entry made me want to get an orkut account myself. Maybe I will, at least for the entertainment value it provides !

sunshine said...

@lakshmi - o yes u shud... not to mention it gets u in touch wid long lost pals!

V said...

If only all orkoromeos got responses like this one.

Props to the chick!

sunshine said...

woooow!! i wonder wat avinash had said to call upon that wrath... nyay.. im inspired!

Rohan said...

LOL, And what about another type: desperatelypitiful!

Just wrote a blog post on the same subject myself:
http://daily-humor.blogspot.com/2007/12/fraandships-on-orkut-netsite.html

Cheers